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Handbook for successful ageing - 6. - 7.


6. Become an optimist, if you are not one, yet
Think positively!

Optimists stroll on the cloud, under which the others mope."
- Prince de Ligne -

The optimist sees an opportunity in every difficulty; the pessimist a difficulty in every opportunity."
- Lawrence Pearsall Jacks -

Examine yourselves if you tend to be more a pessimist than to be an optimist. In this case, you should command your brain to think positively and optimistically. You are able to do it! It will work. "Control your thoughts and you will see that they can easily be directed" (Platon). The change of your thinking will effect your whole life: your health, the pace of your recovery, your mental well-being, your mental ability, your creativity, your perseption ability, your job, your interpersonal relations and even your span of life.

In the way we think and feel in the same way we will act. Everybody who thinks positively will behave itself constructively, will be more motivated, will work more disciplined, have a higher attendance to learn something in addition and will thereby establish itself new ways.

Don’t think from the first on that something will fail you otherwise it will really unsuceed, although it wouldn’t be necessary. The reason for this is the law of the "self accomplish prediction", which affects many happenings and developments. "Nothing in the world is difficult; it is only our thoughts which make things seem like they are difficult" (Arab maxim).

Don’t look at the negative sides but on the positive sides of a thing. Don’t say about the glass it is "half-empty", but it is "half-entired".

You should never stop a matter, which you mean you have to do because you are afraid of making an erreur, unless the risk isn’t disproportional high. Unnecessarily, it would only clam your actionability. You should take any risks on an intention into consideration but only if necessary to react fast and still considered. Don’t think that something is impossible or that someone is not likely to give you his/her agreement. Don’t capitulate because of difficulties. "I believe,... and I don’t believe, that.." shouldn’t exist in this connection any longer for you, but "I trie it". General field marshal Helmuth von Moltke had said:"Nothing ventured, nothing gained!", but also: "think about it before you do it". The knowledge "The sucess is depended from the courage" which we are indebled of the poet Fontane and of the American pastor Vincent Norman Peale with his encouragement (and his book with the same titel) "You can if you think you can!", a book with numerous impressive examples.

Do you want to have sucess? It is indeed possible that you have to work hard and persistently but therefore you shouldn’t doubt that you will manage it. As Horace said: "Nothing is too difficult for human beings", and as Kant said: "I can because I want to do what I must".

If something hadn’t turned out to your imagination you shouldn’t hold you away from the next effort but ask for the "why" to learn how to make it better the next time. You should approach a matter unprejudiged and count that you will have success. Become a "I-can-do-it-thinker"!. We owe the following maxim to the Roman author Seneca: "It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult."

Don’t ask yourself "What can I do?" but ask instead "What do I want?" because then you can do it although it seemed to be impossible.

Beside decide to get more flexible. The more easily we can set to a changed situation the faster and specifically we can react. Say again and again to yourself "Be flexible!"

7. Avoid stress as far as possible!

Try to keep everything away from you or in any case to control all the things which produce you distress, especially permanent stress helps that the rate of radicals (see above 1.6) and the stress hormones adrenalin, noradrenalin and cortisol in the blood become more and more cortisol leads to an increase in weight: the surplus of sugar in the blood is always absorbed quickly, which leads to hunger even though in reality you haven’t consumed any energy. Furthermore, the arteries are contracted and the blood pressure is crowing. In addition, your blood sugar level increases. Therefore, if you have permanent stress, let both occasionally be taken in your pharmacy (see above 9.3.7 and 9.3.13). The blood circulation in the eye is impeded by the contraction of the ateries. Because of that especially Glaukom patients are in danger. Beside the immune system is been put down. We will not only become more susceptible for infection deseases but also become sensitive for cancer because our immune system cannot remove as fast as normally faulty cells. In the stomach removes the balance of acid and the mucus layer. Because of the removement it is possible that absesses and inflammations are built. Futhermore the nerve system is more stressed. Tinnitus - a permanent rush or a whistle in the ear can be possible or it could happen that the person will become an "acute hearing loss". Because of permanent stress you can be tired, it can cause sleeping disorder, delay the wound healing process and even it can end up in the "burnt-out-syntrom". The musculation of the back can be braced. It can also happen that you will get adache syntroms. Then the back musculation can tense up. It can also happen that you will become stress headache and hyperthyroidism. Furthermore, stress can reduce the ability to store information. Finally, permanent stress can cause the growth of visceral fat. (See above, 2.2)

The result of all these things is faster aging. We will look tired,get grey hair rapidly, loose hairs and the skin will lose its elasticy. For people who are cardiac, stress is a higher risk factor as smoking. It can lead to arrhythmia and eventually even to cardiac death.

Principly, you can help yourselves, by establishing priorities, to ask yourselves what is important, less important and irrelavant for you. To provent disstress you should ask yourself, if you do not know yet, what the reason of the distress was and arrange your future behaviour of it. In very stressy situation breathe as deep as possible and breathe as slowly as possible out. Remain some seconds, repeat it and thereby cunjure up positiv emotions as possible like joy, love and gratitude or tense all muscles for a few seconds and then relax suddenly. Only this can help to reduce stress. Furthermore, you should chew chewing gum. If this alone does not help you, look for mental training exercises (see above, 5.4) which require extreme concentration and do some exercises (see above, 3.3.2).

The earliest you will reach the composure which we need to avoid permanent stress if you strike off the phrases "If I should be..." and "I would have been..." out of your vocabulary. Try to change things or to be changed by others which let change themselves but accept the irrevocability insteed of be annoyed about it because annoyance produces stress. Think of the: prayer by Friedrich Oetinger:

God, give me the composure to accept things which I can’t change.
the energy to change the things which I can change and
the wisdom to differentiate the one from the other.

I was 20 years old when I had traveled home from afar. I had to change and I knew that my train had arrived on the same plattform as my connecting train was leaving. The train had a delay. It was becoming bigger and I was becoming more and more nervously. Finally, we stopped directly before the connecting station. And now I knwe that we couldn’t go to the station because the connecting train was waiting on our plattform. 30 seconds I had got angry but then I told myself that I couldn’t still change it and I had got calm again. Since that time I hadn’t got angry and I’m sure that this ehaviour prevents me from so many typicallly ill-calculated reactions.

"You are missing sixty seconds of happiness during every minute you spend being angry."
- William Somerset Maugham -

Talk to people who are annoyed of things they do. This is also valid for superior: " I would like to say: It desturbs me that..... I would be very pleased if you could change this". If people aren’t willed to change their behaviour, you should decide to let them as they are. With it you have withdrawn the bottom of your annoyance. But possibly you have to change yourself. Think about it and if necessare talk to someone about it. (see bolow 8.1) If you are annoyed about something ask youreself if you can change, replace or if you can give it up. If it is not possible then take it as it is. In this way you have a high opportunity to live until a highage.

It would be stupid to get annoyed about the world. It doesn’t care.
- Mark Aurel -

Listen to the Dalai Lama who says " It is unnecessarily to be annoyed about something. You should not even be angry about your enemies. It is much more intelligent to love his enemies. The same says Jesus in his Mountain prediction - a deep wisdom!"

If you nevertheless feel yourself be overpowered by stress you shouldn’t try to manage them by eating, drinking of alcohol and smoking or manage bigger exertions. You should rather do an automatically training according Mr. Schultz (progressive muscle relaxing according Jacobson, fantasy journey) or make standing-exercises of the "Whole-body-training" (see above 3.3.2)

Also noise advances the release of stress hormones and this actually asleep. Therefore, if necessary, replace your simply window with a double-glassed-window in your bedroom. Stressed parents don’t only endanger themselves but also their children.

It also exists positive stress (Eustress). It will be made if we are intensively pleased about something or if we do something which satisfies us. It leads us to action and helps us to solve problems. We should look for it!





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